I understand that randomly packaged packs of cards/minis/whatever… aren’t.  There’s a very good reason for this; true randomness would be prohibitively expensive to assure.  Then, when the truly random packs got to the customers, there would be complaints that people weren’t able to build the full set after so many packs.  Getting the same rare five times in a row does in fact sometimes happen with a truly random distribution.

You can also read this as “people are bad at math.”

Still, some attempt at randomness should be made. For a couple of years, AEG’s CCGs were not randomized in the box, and so one could go through a box and pull out every foil and chase rare, leaving the chafe behind.  This is a bad thing.

But the collation for the new D&D minis set?  Way beyond that.  Our first two cases opened, for a total of 12 packs, were identical.  All 8 miniatures, supposed drawn from separate groups, were identical. There is simply no excuse for that sort of laziness.

Then I won several drinks by betting gullible customers that I could call all the miniatures in pack 12 before opening it, so I suppose it could be worse.

The page trackers tell me that Google views this as a good site to get advice on “jobs at game stores.” One of the oddities of having the domain be WordPress, I suppose. Still, it implies that I might want to put some actual solid advice out there. So…

First off, and far and away most important: You are applying for a job. In many cases, a rather hard job with rather poor pay. You are not applying to get paid for reading comic books. You are not applying to get paid to play Magic. You are not applying to get paid to paint miniatures. You are not applying to get paid to talk to your friends. And you are certainly not applying to get paid to do nothing.

This is, unfortunately, a common attitude among applicants. If possible, I would choose to hire someone who has extensive retail service, because they are more likely to understand what a retail job entails than someone who simply thinks that it’s cool to work at a game shop. There is tons and tons of work to get done in this kind of store, most of it in the nickel & dime categories. For example, bagging comic books. OUr weekly comic order averages just under 1000 books (we’ll call it even for the simple math). Say it takes you five seconds to insert a board into a bag, insert a comic into said bag, and tape it shut (it takes that long, provided that you don’t get one piece caught on something, or the comic is thicker than average, or your hand cramps, etc.). At peak efficiency then, you’ve spent 5000 seconds, or 83 minutes, or an hour and a half bagging comics, each week. A little job, that no one thinks about, and yet so much time spent. If you apply to work here, you’re gonna end up doing that sort of job with the majority of your time.

Next, look presentable and professional. Now, I’m not saying wear a suit to the interview (although, honestly, it can’t hurt). I am saying that you need to be able to sell yourself as a product. That’s really what you’re doing. You’re coming into the store, looking to convince us to lease “Bob” for a few years. We’re gonna ask the kind of questions that any prospective buyer will. Does Bob get good gas mileage (how efficient is he at getting things done)? Are other customers satisfied with Bob (references and review in order)? How does the crash safety stack up (….actually, that one already translates pretty well…)?

If you don’t have these things in order, don’t expect to get a job. In retail in particular, image is exceptionally important. You end up putting your image to work, every day, in support of the store. If your image isn’t consistent, or lacks certain qualities, than the store cannot rely on it, and you won’t get hired.

I’ve been talking about oversights here, but I suppose I should also mention the obvious. If your image is bad, you won’t get a job, period. Bad images can come from negative reviews, or other application specific data. Bad images can also come from your behavior in the store previous to the interview. If you neglect to shower regularly, we’ve probably noticed, and you’re not gonna get hired. If you’ve been consistently rude and/or abrasive when playing with other, we’ve probably noticed it, and you’re not gonna get hired. Not that there’s necessarily anything wrong with these traits; we’re not judging you as a person, we’re judging the suitability or your image for the store.

Third, knowledge of the products helps. Sure, we can teach you about the various merchandise we have, and selling stuff is a skill all on it’s own. But it’s ten times easier to sell a game if you can say “Sure, I’ve played it. I thought…” Not every product line, of course. But applicants that are familiar with two or more or our product groups (Mini, CCGs, RPGs, Comics, Board Games) get a fast bump to the top of the list.

Forth, bribery is not a dirty word. Yes, it may seem a little unfair, but that’s what makes the world go ’round. Sometimes this is on the up and up; volunteering to DM a game, run a demo, cleaning up, convention freebies, and so on into the multitudes. Sometimes this is illicit; juicy gaming gossip, home-made cookies, and that sort. In either case, the act shows not only that you are willing to help the store already, but that you can be a friendly, nice guy (which ties back into point two).

Fifth, don’t bank on it. We’ve got five employees right now, and there are a bunch of stores smaller than us. We get about ten applications each month. No matter how cool it might be, do not put all your hopes in one basket. Odds are, even if you’re perfect, we’re not going to hire you. Sorry.

And a final word on gender. If you’re female, do not expect to get a job at a comic or game shop. I know that sounds sexist. It’s also the way the world works. There’s a multitude of factors against you. Many gamers are, let’s be honest, intimidated by females. Even if the hiring manager isn’t one of that sort, that fact affects your salable image poorly. There’s an automatic assumption that women are less knowledgeable about this hobby than men. Again, even if the hiring manager doesn’t buy it, he has to consider it, since it may mean that customers will not purchase from you. And you will be weirded by the all day long stares from the regulars. By all means, take the time to apply if you’d really like a job. But point five goes doubly or triply for you.

We’re a reasonably large store, as far as small businesses go. But we are still, in fact, a small business. There are currently five employees for the store.

We get all sorts of people looking to work here. After all, who wouldn’t want to get paid to read comic books or play games. Many of the people who apply simply don’t understand that this is a job like any other, and work does in fact need to get done.

But sometimes, there are highlights to the crowd that we will certainly not hire. As a word of advice to the potentials out there:

If you’ve given us an application, we know you’re looking for a job. Checking back once is fine. Checking back every week is not.
Calling one of our product groups (i.e. comics, minis, etc.) “a crappy hobby” is not a good start.
Asking for a job is OK. Demanding that you get one, or you’ll never shop here again, isn’t.
Just because you’ve got boobs doesn’t mean that we’ll give you a job. The employees here are not the socially akward type (…mostly).
If you need to have you’re friend ask for you, we won’t have much faith in your ability to talk to customers.
If one of us tells you we’re not hiring, you’re not going to get a different answer from someone else.
Muttering “I can’t believe to lame-ass fucking comic book store won’t even hire me,” on your way out pretty much kills of any lingering doubts we might have had towards your suitability for the store.

To balance this out, here are some things you can do to be considered hiring material:

Be helpful. Volunteer to DM, answer questions, help tidy up after yourself or others.
Bring us food. Especially when there’s only one person on shift.
Talk with us. Not to us, and not at us.
And if all else fails, defeating one of us in one-on-one combat to the death will ensure you the spot of the defeated, Highlander style.

Games Workshop is releasing the latest edition of their 40K rules set this weekend. (That’s 5th Edition, for you folks keeping track at home). In celebration of this (arguably) momentous event, they’ve organized a tournament to be run simultaneously at a bunch of independent stores, in addition to the official GW Battle Bunkers.

I have no problems with the Games Workshop product line. Their casts tend to be clean, and are interesting and complex. Their costs are reasonable, even if on the high end thereof. Their rules set caters well to the type of gamer that makes up their market.

No, the problems I have with GW are with the company itself, and some of their absurd policies. For example, making certain pieces available only direct from them? Equivalent to flipping the bird at local retailers. Limited release items that are “out of stock,” but that individuals can still order? Requiring retailers to order from all three product lines, including the sells-about-as-fast-as-a-space-heater-in-the-Sahara Lord of the Rings line, in order to get free shipping and event support? More spitting in the face. These types of decisions are why I dread dealing with the company in any capacity.

Back to the events. GW has gone all out on this weekend: We’ll be giving out $430 retail worth of Games Workshop products this weekend, at a series of free events. GW will be reimbursing us for this support.

That’s absurd. That amount is just slightly under what we’ve sold worth of GW products for the past two weeks. And GW is simply handing it away to people.

So, either I’m doing something very wrong here, or they are. If (…when) we only get two people showing up this weekend, I’ll be pretty comfortable in assuming that it’s them. But in the meantime, hey, free GW stuff if you come play.

There has been an abnormally large number of people in the store this weekend.  As I take a moment to hack this out, there are 20 people playing Yugioh, 12 people playing in the Pokemon League, a couple of L5R games, and several customers browsing. (I am happy about the number of Pokemon people, as it’s something we’ve been working on heavily recently).  That’s about what it’s been for the entire weekend.

Despite this, sales the weekend have been very poor.  People simply aren’t spending any money.  Why is this?  Perhaps it’s that the majority of the people in here right now are kids, and therefore do not have jobs.  But this rings false, as kids in this town receive absurdly large allowances, and the gamers tend to spend all of it here in the store.  Perhaps it’s the general heat, oppressive as it is.  But we’ve got the AC on, and people are braving the sun to get here at least.  Or perhaps it’s that no one has been ab;e to cash their paychecks yet, because of the holiday.  That’s the answer I’m leaning towards, and if I’m right we’ll see a pickup of sales next weekend.

But for now, it’s a mystery, and I’m stumped.

I’ve coined a new term – Omega Testing. This is the testing that is done after a product is live and in the field. Omega testing is what gets products recalled, or, in my world, errata-ed.

Learn it, use it, love it.

After dire threats of bodily harm from my local group should I choose not to attend, I did in fact play in a Pro Tour Qualifier for the first time since Kamigawa Block, three years ago.

I also did poorly. 1-2 drop. That’s poorly. And I can’t really blame it on my odd deck choices this time, since I was handed a card for card copy of a Kithkin deck that has won Block events this season.

Is it me? Am I simply not as good a player as my local group thinks I am?

In both of the matches I lost, I made one large play mistake. Perhaps that’s it. In times past, I never noticed myself making mistakes. I know that this can’t be because I didn’t make them, so there must be evolution or growth of some sort. But can just one mistake be enough to swing an entire match? And in this format, which is regarded as reasonably balanced?

Perhaps it’s always been this way. Perhaps the experts at the game have all long ago realized that there’s no such thing as perfect consistency in a full day of games, and that playing for luck is better than playing for perfection. I, too, had a couple of “oops, I win” moments today. Can it be that my poor luck haunts me here as well?

I’ll be attending the next one as well, after the format rotates into Eventide. And I’ll try to spend more time testing for this one. But if the local gauntlet looks to favor the “oops, I win” paradigm, then I’m going to play some pile of random jank. If I’m relying on luck to win, I might as well enjoy myself while I’m at it.

“Yeah, of course they’re in mint condition.”
“Yeah, they’re like a couple decades old.”
“What, you’re too good for my collection?”
“I took real good care of them.”
“Yeah, I’ve got a Spiderman #1 at home. You interested in that?”
“What do you mean you won’t pay that? That’s what the book says they’re worth. I want my fucking money!”
“Fuck You!”
“Go to Hell!”
“Eat Shit!”
“I’m just looking for a few bucks to buy gifts for the holiday….Yeah, well fuck you!”

I’m starting to notice a bit of a trend. It’s actually easier than it sounds, since people looking to sell tend to come in in rather large clumps. I don’t think that I’ve been any more vitriolous than usual towards them, so I’d guess that the holiday season really does bring out the worst in people. The important thing to remember is that you are running a store, not running a charity. People don’t look to sell quality product any more; there’s Ebay for that. No, people are looking for handouts, and you simply cannot give it to them and still expect to remain in business.

Still makes me feel a bit bad, though.

Item 1: How many times should a shopkeep watch bungled attempts at theft before stepping in. One of these little buggers first walked behind the counter to raid the singles showcase. He’s short, so it might have gone unnoticed, were I not staring at him the whole time. Next, he attempted to claim that a number of MtG singles were commons, and cost $.10 each. One of the other employees caught that one. Finally, on the way out, he grabbed an entire binder of L5R from another customer and attempted to offski.

This entire series of events is quite puzzling to me. He’s the right age for YuGiOh, but he also went for MtG (I could see that), and L5R (WTF!). He had a believeable excuse each time, so it’s conceiveable that this is simply rampant stupidity. Needless to says, he was asked not to come back.

Item 2: I have reached the point where I considered poor sportsmanship grounds for expulsion. One of the YuGiOh kids suffered this wrath today. I’ll put up with grumpiness. I’ll even accept a modicum of trash talk. But if you ever 1) Yell top-of-lungs at an opponent, 2) Snatch (yes, that’s the right verb) cards or results slips out of hands, or 3) Falsify the results slip and then lie about it, you’ll be DQed and booted.

One of these days I’ll crack, and I’ll punt one of the little shits. I figure I can make at least 20 feet…

“You know what EarthSea reminded me of? Harry Potter on crack.”